Dr. Marie-Claire Moreau

Educator, Coach, Life Strategist

Covering all the bases

Homeschooling moms and dads sometimes worry about covering all the bases.  Particularly when just starting out, they may worry that they haven’t taught all the subjects correctly or that they’ve missed something terribly important along the way.  This is perfectly understandable, and many homeschoolers will admit to feeling exactly the same way at one point or another.

It may be helpful to look at this concern from a couple of different angles, the first being to ask the question, in all seriousness, “Does it really matter?” That is, of all of the things that are learned in homeschool, does it really make that much difference if something small is actually overlooked?  Unless the omission is something quite major — as in a child not knowing how to read, write, perform basic computations, or generally understand his or her system of government – does it really matter in the larger scheme of things?  Looking at it statistically may help, too.  How likely is it that this particular child will actually need to recall and utilize each and every piece of trivia learned during his or her school years?  If the student really didn’t learn whatever-it-was, will it severely impair them as an adult?

The second angle is all about asking why a family is homeschooling at all.  That is, having chosen homeschooling generally means families aren’t particularly satisfied with the way things are taught in schools anyway.  That being said, why try to teach exactly what is taught in schools and, moreover, who’s to say what they’re doing is right anyway?  The school-at-home approach, the method which tries to duplicate what goes on in conventional classrooms, is only one way to homeschool.  There are others to consider trying, too.

A third perspective involves thinking ahead to the overall accumulation of knowledge over a child’s entire homeschool experience.  Knowledge, experience and wisdom are cumulative – things that keep growing larger and larger with every passing school year, and throughout a person’s lifetime, too.  If something really is missed in an earlier grade, there is a pretty good chance someone will notice it later on, and cover it then (“Woops!  I guess I forgot to show you how to reduce fractions last year.  Let’s quickly learn it now…”).   Or perhaps nobody will notice but the student will somehow learn it anyway, naturally, during the course of school and everyday life, perhaps even easier now that the student is that much older (“Wow,  I guess I’d better figure out how to create a resume since I’m looking at getting a job soon.”).   Look at it this way – if primary colors aren’t specifically taught in preschool or kindergarten, does that mean a child will never learn them?  Can you even imagine a child who doesn’t know the difference between blue, red and yellow as an adult, even if they never had a lesson on colors?  Sometimes things get learned anyhow – even if they were never covered in homeschool at all. 

And for those who still worry about covering all of the bases, consider this option.  There are many useful guides that parents can follow to be sure that most of the traditional subject areas are covered.  Many homeschoolers use these guides as a way to plan the year, being sure they don’t miss anything that students that age typically cover that year.  These resources can range from reviewing national standards, to looking over statewide requirements, to using curriculum products with a “scope & sequence”, to buying books that outline a traditional course of study for every grade from K-12.  Obtaining one of these guides is a very easy and inexpensive way to take the guesswork out of what to cover, and put one’s mind at ease that nothing important has been missed along the way.  Some of these resources are described in this post.

As a final note, parents are reminded to slow down and relax about the process.  Despite their fears, it is highly unlikely that good, conscientious parents who diligently homeschool their children will forget any of the big things anyhow.   Though they worry about it happening, it really seldom does.  After the first year or two of homeschooling, once the learning curve levels off a bit and parents become more comfortable with the entire process, these things tend to take care of themselves.  Worrying about them only makes the early homeschooling years more nerve-wracking, plus having access to general homeschooling information and a decent support system ordinarily helps to avoid these kinds of problem altogether anyway.

[Photo: Free Digital]

Poor choices don’t have to linger

When homeschooling — correction, when parenting in general – we sometimes make mistakes.  These can happen at the beginning, when we don’t exactly know what we’re doing (as in, “I’m supposed to stick the thermometer there? Seriously?”).  But they can also happen at any time, when we act impulsively, are trying to save money, aren’t thinking quite right, or just make a genuine human error.

Making poor choices for the kids can happen to anybody.  It’s normal.  And it happens to the best of us, don’t let anybody or any homeschooling web site fool you into thinking otherwise.  I have made my share and, though I know a lot more now than I did then, I still fall prey to misleading advertising now and then, falling in love with things that I know my kids won’t like nearly as much as I do, and snapping up a bargain even though it’s not exactly what I was looking for.   That’s just life.  And try as hard as I can to overcome it, all parents have “moments” when impulsive or incorrect decisions are made.

Making poor choices for homeschool can be a lot like eating that Big Mac you ordered last week.  Or buying those jeans you picked up on clearance the other day.  Or like letting the kids stay up way past their bedtime because they absolutely promised they’d stay quiet and not make a mess all over the living room.  Sometimes, things just don’t go as planned.  The jeans don’t really fit, even though you hoped you could somehow squeeze yourself in.  The burger, though it tasted great during the first couple of bites, wasn’t worth the 540 perfectly good calories you wasted on it.  And the kids? Well, let’s just say that sleeping would have been a lot more peaceful in the middle of a jungle swatting at biting insects all night.

And so it goes with homeschooling choices, too.  Sometimes, we just pick wrong.  It’s really that simple.  It’s either the wrong method or the wrong book or the wrong time of day or the wrong set of circumstances.  And whether the book was on sale or the grade-level wasn’t quite right, no amount of justifying can make it so — whatever-it-is just isn’t right for your child.  At least not now. And probably never.

Though it can be hard to swallow, particularly after spending a bundle of cash or when we really love something ourselves (think those cute little erasers or that sweet little story book), poor choices must be dealt with.  It makes absolutely no sense to waste time on inappropriate materials, as wasting time just means less time left over to do something good.  Plus, picking wrong can actually cause road-blocks and confusion, too, as in not explaining ideas very well or teaching things completely differently than you’ve been doing all along.  Though the results are usually short-lived, incorrect picks can cause a tangled mess of ideas or even a reversal of the progress you’ve made so far.  Not good when left to go too long.

So, like the Big Mac or the jeans, recognize the error and move on.  Don’t let regrets keep you stuck.  And certainly don’t dwell on failures that overall don’t amount to a whole lot by the end of 12-15 years of homeschooling.  Just take stock, re-tool, and forge ahead all the wiser.

If it helps, poor product choices can always be sold at auction, saved for siblings who might actually enjoy them or put up for sale at the next homeschooling curriculum sale — most homeschoolers have at least one box full of things they wished they’d never bought.  Poor course choices can be placed on hold for a while or children can be withdrawn altogether, usually without penalty and not so much as a trace on anybody’s radar.  Poor methodology can be replaced with a new approach, often as early as the very same day that you notice the problem, and with little to no preparation at all.

Nothing in homeschool is permanent or irreparable, and everything can be corrected within the realm of the incredibly efficient and completely personalized experience that we call home school.   No need to worry.  Poor choices don’t have to linger.  Just make the change.

Related articles:

…about changing things up a little

…about total control of curriculum choices

…about re-evaluating curriculum choices

Getting started – new book plus other tips

Making the decision to homeschool is one thing.  Starting to do it is another thing entirely.

Parents have described the learning curve as being awfully steep during the first weeks and months of homeschooling.  Some express confusion and frustration over not knowing what they don’t know, and then having to learn it all in random order, often in a fairly short amount of time.

This does not have to be the case.

Beginning to homeschool can be easy!

Having the right tools is the key.

There are many resources available to new homeschooling families to ease the transition and make the learning curve more gradual.  Modern families are fortunate because they can benefit from the experiences and writings of both the original homeschooling pioneers and the most recent homeschooling veterans.  These are the folks who have learned the hard way, done all of the experimentation and have fine-tuned and perfected the practice of home education.  And now, they’re willing to help new families just joining the homeschooling community — and there is no greater gift to newcomers than hearing from those who have done it before.

Help for newcomers comes in many, many forms.  Store shelves are lined with books about teaching, education, learning, homeschooling and more.  The Internet too is a resource, boasting thousands upon thousands of web pages and blogs ready to explain even the tiniest bit of minutiae to anyone interested in reading about it. Local and statewide organizations can also help.  Friends and neighbors who have homeschooled have more information still.  Plus, there are homeschool conventions to attend, co-ops to join and consultants you can pay, too.

Perhaps the only problem remaining for today’s homeschoolers is navigating this vast universe of homeschooling information and knowing exactly where to begin.  As homeschooling becomes more and more mainstream, it can be hard to decide exactly where and how to jump in and whose advice to listen to, at least at the very beginning.

In my book, Suddenly Homeschooling, I outline a fool-proof series of steps that can be used to enter those first few weeks of homeschooling with ease.  I chart a course for new families to follow, making it easy to identify what needs to be completed when, explaining every little step along the way.  Parents who read the book will be legally homeschooling in no time at all, and will have gained the knowledge and confidence they need to continue entirely on their own.   The book tells homeschoolers exactly what to do using an easy checklist format, so that nothing is left out, and everything is done in the proper sequence, too.  It’s a one-stop solution to starting to homeschool, so there is no need to buy anything else.

New homeschoolers don’t have to go it alone.  Even the most independent and resourceful individuals sometimes need a hand when entering unfamiliar territory.  Taking advantage of the wisdom and experience of those who have come before will lessen the learning curve and end the confusion of navigating the homeschooling universe of information, too.

Whether opting to purchase a homeschooling book, taking the advice of a great homeschooling friend, or using any of the other available methods, modern homeschoolers have no reason — ever – to go it alone.  Get some help and make the transition to homeschooling as joyful as it was meant to be!

Feeling overwhelmed? Try these rescue strategies!

As if their plates weren’t already full enough, millions of Americans have also decided to add a large helping of homeschooling onto their dinner plates as well.  What was just an ordinary busy life can — for some – become an extraordinarily overwhelming life, complete with the additional duties of schooling and being home all day, not to mention the scary feeling of being responsible for it all.

But homeschooling doesn’t have to feel this way.  And — it shouldn’t!

The homeschooling life can be a joy and should never be something families dread.  If it becomes a chore or something much worse, changes absolutely need to be made.

Heed these instructions and see if they don’t make a quick and very positive impact on your feelings toward homeschooling.  The joy CAN return after these 3 simple steps:

1. Take a break.  First and foremost, stop everything!  Take a day off, a mini-vacation or field trip, “veg out” with television and some good books, or do whatever it takes to stop thinking about homeschooling for a little bit — a day, a week, or even two if it takes that long.  Breathe. Do something fun. Stepping back for a little bit will allow you to look at homeschooling much more objectively in a couple of days.

2. Find support.  If you haven’t already, now would be the time to seek out others like you.  Get online, make some calls, hang out at the park or library in the mornings, or anything you can do to meet other moms and dads you can talk to.  It’s amazing how much better you’ll feel after hearing that you aren’t alone, and that others have experienced the very same thing at one time or another.

3. Make some changes.  In your homeschool.  Or in your life.  In expectations, in curriculum, in scheduling, in activites, or in anything else.  Just make a change.  You can’t expect anything to be different if you keep doing the same thing over and over again.  Once you begin homeschooling again, by all means, switch things up.  Begin gradually. Drop a subject or two. Change from a book to an online program. School later in the day. Let your child pick what she wants to do a couple of times a week.  Sit outside instead of inside. Whatever it takes — just make a change. And if that one doesn’t work, make another. And another. Until things feel better.

Lastly, by all means, don’t give up!  Trying these simple rescue strategies are guaranteed to make positive changes — if not save your homeschooling entirely.  And please take a moment to read this post about giving up too soon.

Will my child ever be ready?


Readiness comes at different times in different children. Some read at age 4 while others wait until they are 8 or 9 to do it. Some youngsters write short stories at 8 yet others aren’t ready until 16.

In the homeschooling world, though it can be hard to wait, exactly when things begin to happen doesn’t matter as much as one might think. While parents may wish the kids would start sooner, no amount of pushing, coaxing, bribery or worrying about it will necessarily make it so.

It may help to think about homeschool in the same way one might think about extracurricular activities. If a child doesn’t really like ballet, does she still have to do it? Or if a child is afraid of the soccer ball, are you still going to sign him up?  Potty use doesn’t always come early either.  And no matter how long you’ve tried and the methods you may have used, the truth is that toddlers generally use the toilet on their terms and only when good and ready.

It can be tough to wait on a child when others her age are doing something. But forcing a child to perform something she isn’t ready for is generally fruitless and frustrating anyhow.  Experiencing disappointment and feelings of inadequacy can come on as well. Waiting several weeks or months, even a year or two in some cases, until the level of readiness is reached may be be best for all concerned. [Note that readiness is different from willingness — another topic altogether.]

First time homeschoolers working with a first-born sometimes feel pressured to meet milestones, record bench-marks, and keep up with the pack.  I find it very endearing to watch new parents fret over babies and new homeschoolers worry if everything they’re doing is exactly right.  I was once there, too and I understand.  Over time, however, with subsequent children comes a slightly more relaxed attitude and the realization that added pressure doesn’t speed things along any more quickly than waiting it out anyhow.  

Much like patience is learned through parenting, exercising great patience is important during homeschooling as well.  And while mastering course requirements can certainly become very important in upper school while preparing for testing and college, waiting it out during the early years avoids excess anxiety and unpleasantness for parents and students alike.